how i wish you were here.
Often I find myself wondering of what could’ve been, but isn’t that just a waste of thought? They say there is no such thing as would’ve could’ve been, just what is, what has been, and what will be. Only in our imaginations can we grasp the visual of what could’ve happened, or what we desired to happen.
I wish things were different, and I could have the same pure happiness I had in 2010 before the cold of December that rung in with life changing events forever. Though it’s been over a year now, I am always haunted with facing reality, though I’ve come to realization of it quite some time ago. I’m still happy, I’m still who I’ve always been. There just seems to be something lacking. I believe I know what it is. Only time can change it.
it’s been awhile.
I haven’t on here as much as I originally thought I would. But here I am now.
I have this jealousy problem that I’m very much aware of, but I can’t really pinpoint why I have it. It seems to be there with everyone close to me. I just feel replaced really easily, I suppose. Sometimes it gets me into situations that could’ve been avoided, but I tend to feel like I’m in the right.
I don’t know how long it’ll stay with me..